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Dean McKendrick
Mary Carey, Erika Jordan, Christine Ngyuen, Karlie Montana, Adriana Chechik, Michelle Maylene
Writing Credits:
Dean McKendrick

Efforts to develop a new sexual enhancement formula go terribly wrong when the beautiful test subjects lapse into a trance-like state. With the Zombie Housewives wandering the neighborhood no one is safe until a trio of college cheerleaders rush in to save the day.

Rated NR

Aspect Ratio: 1.78:1/16X9
English Dolby Digital 2.0
Not Closed-captioned
Supplements Subtitles:

Runtime: 81 min.
Price: $14.98
Release Date: 3/24/2015

• Blooper and Outtake Reel
• Trailers


Panasonic TC-P60VT60 60-Inch 1080p 600Hz 3D Smart Plasma HDTV; Sony STR-DG1200 7.1 Channel Receiver; Panasonic DMP-BD60K Blu-Ray Player using HDMI outputs; Michael Green Revolution Cinema 6i Speakers (all five); Kenwood 1050SW 150-watt Subwoofer.


College Coeds vs. Zombie Housewives (2015)

Reviewed by Colin Jacobson (February 26, 2015)

Can a red-blooded heterosexual male resist a movie called College Coeds vs. Zombie Housewives? Probably. Can a red-blooded heterosexual male resist a movie called College Coeds vs. Zombie Housewives when a free copy shows up in his mailbox? Apparently not.

Sexually frustrated scientist Gary (Frankie Dell) can’t get any action from his hot wife Tracy (Karlie Montana), mainly because she cheats on him with his pal Hank (Andrew Espinoza Long). Because Gary thinks he needs to spark Tracy’s libido, he develops a drug to boost the female sex drive.

Unfortunately, test subjects develop a condition that puts them into a trance – and also turns them aggressive and violent. As “zombie housewives” overrun the area, local cheerleaders Judy (Erika Jordan), Kara (Adriana Chechik) and Laurel (Michelle Maylene) need to stop them.

A few years back, I watched a few flicks like Bikini Royale, spoofs that were short on comedy/plot and heavy on nudity/sex. Coeds comes from the same studio as those movies and feels exceptionally similar to the earlier efforts.

When I viewed Royale in 2008, I liked it, though I think that was mostly because it offered more nudity than I expected. I thought it’d give us a little T&A, but instead, it presented a lot of graphic skin.

Stripped (ha!) of that element, though, there wasn’t much to the movie, and matters haven’t changed since then. Actually, from a certain POV, they’ve gotten worse. While Coeds throws out tons of sex scenes, it seems oddly squeamish when it comes to the depiction of full-frontal nudity. We got plenty of those images in Royale but none appear in Coeds; women strip all the time, but we don’t get to see them in the all-together.

Coeds does deliver lots of sex, but like its predecessors, these scenes fall short of “X”-rated explicitness. Characters appear to perform all sorts of acts, but the movie doesn’t show them in an explicit way. I don’t mind that so much, but the absence of the full nudity becomes a bigger nuisance.

The way in which Coeds compromises between “R”-rated movies with dollops of skin and actual hardcore porn makes it an odd beast. It’s like “porn lite”, as it comes with many of the same components as the harder stuff but tames these in a way that makes the result less likely to make many viewers happy.

Perhaps if Coeds fared better as a narrative, it’d be able to overcome its other drawbacks. However, the story exists as nothing more than an excuse for all those sex scenes – and a really flimsy excuse, at that.

Much of the film presents something of a soap opera related to cheating spouses, so the actual “coeds vs. zombies” motif fills next to no running time. The flick throws out a “fight scene” that lasts maybe two minutes and that’s it; no attempt to make this an actual horror/action film occurs.

Sure, one could argue “who cares?”, as I acknowledge movies like this just want to give us a lot of sex and a little campy fun. If Coeds succeeded in the latter regard, I’d appreciate it more, but the narrative sequences seem so dull that they’re nearly pointless. Clearly zombie movies offer fertile ground for parody, but nothing here scores points in that regard.

On the positive side, Coeds features a cast of extremely attractive women – well, except for Mary Carey. She plays Gary’s colleague, and she looks awful. Though only in her early 30s, Carey appears to have had so much plastic surgery that she now resembles a 50-year-old woman trying to look decades younger. She wouldn’t be attractive under any circumstances, but among a cast of genuinely gorgeous women, she becomes an unpleasant distraction.

That negative aside, guys will find ample eye candy among the actresses of Coeds. They add some visual spice to the proceedings, but they can’t overcome the movie’s general dullness. A flimsy narrative connected by a bunch of repetitive sex scenes, Coeds becomes a bit of a bore.

The DVD Grades: Picture B-/ Audio C/ Bonus D

College Coeds vs. Zombie Housewives appears in an aspect ratio of 1.78:1 on this single-sided, single-layered DVD; the image has been enhanced for 16X9 televisions. The DVD offered decent but not great visuals.

For the most part, sharpness was pretty good. Occasional examples of softness appeared, and these caused a few distractions, but the image usually offered reasonably positive delineation. I saw some light shimmering and jaggies, but the movie lacked edge haloes. I also detected no print flaws.

Coeds opted for a natural palette, and the colors became a fairly strong aspect of the image. They didn’t leap off the screen, but they showed mostly positive reproduction. Blacks seemed pretty dark and deep, and shadows were decent. Given the movie’s low budget and SD-DVD presentation, it was more than acceptable.

Don’t expect much from the Dolby Digital 2.0 soundtrack of Coeds, as it’s a stretch to refer to this as a multi-channel mix. The majority of the material remained monaural; the side speakers opened up with passable stereo music but not much more. Overall, the track felt monaural the majority of the time.

Audio quality was fine. Speech seemed a little thin but was usually fairly natural, and the lines remained intelligible. Effects were a minor aspect of the track and all appeared to come straight from the original shoot. That meant these elements remained flat and without much range. <

Music was the best part of the track, but it wasn’t special either. The score sounded somewhat bland and didn’t present great dimensionality. In the end, this was a mediocre soundtrack.

Only a few extras appear here. A Blooper and Outtake Reel lasts three minutes, 30 seconds and offers the usual assortment of goofs and giggles. Oddly, the bloopers all come from other movies; you’ll find nothing from Coeds.

We get trailers for Coeds, Erotic Vampires of Beverly Hills, Lust In Space, Bikini Avengers and Invisible Centerfolds.

Despite a mostly gorgeous cast, College Coeds vs. Zombie Housewives lacks much zing. The women look great but the story goes nowhere and the copious amounts of fake sex become tedious. The DVD offers good visuals but comes with bland audio and no notable supplements. Even with all those beautiful women, the movie turns into a bit of a snoozer.

Viewer Film Ratings: 3.75 Stars Number of Votes: 8
0 3:
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