Reviewed by Colin Jacobson (May 17, 2005)
Playboy started with the notion that it featured the “girl next door” - just naked. It was a brilliant conceit, as it made the women more accessible to the average reader. Theoretically, these weren’t unattainable models - they were the same women you’d meet at the grocery store or near the mailbox.
This was never really true, of course. Whether they live next door or in some mystical Babeland, the average guy has little chance to hook up with a Playboy model. Nonetheless, the concept of the “girl next door” continues, and technology has abetted it as seen in Playboy’s Sexiest Amateur Home Videos.
A collection of clips created by non-professionals, Videos presents 10 models as they pose and chat about themselves. The show introduces us to Lancaster, California’s Alyssa Lovelace, Jelena Jensen of Los Angeles, Verneesha Shea of Saratoga Springs NY, Las Vegas’s Marissa Renee, Sweden’s Anika Knudsen, Sasha Singleton of Huntington Beach, California, Pittsburgh’s Liza Hartling, Jessica Kershner of Seattle, Woodbury, New Jersey’s Giana Taylor, and Ashley Puida from Portland, Connecticut.
The videos exist as de facto auditions. The models sent them in so they could try out for Playboy’s Sexy Girls Next Door show. It places a few models in a mansion and watches the shenanigans develop.
Amateur shows us almost none of that, as it concentrates on the original audition tapes. That means some inconsistencies in the pieces because they’re created by amateurs, but most of them present the models in a mix of scenarios like swimming pools and bedrooms. Some get a little more creative and include things like car washing and cooking. The models also discuss themselves, with an emphasis on their turn-ons and why they should be selected for the Sexy Girls Next Door show.
Despite the non-professional status of the pieces, Amateur is quite good. For one, it includes a consistently solid roster of models. I’ll more directly address them in a minute, but here’s one exceedingly pleasant surprise: no implants! As far as I can tell, not a single model here sports “enhancements”. That’s a really great development.
Amateur is also occasionally a bit more graphic than the average Playboy video. We get more shots of the semi-gynecological nature than usual, as models like Shea give us a pretty open viewpoint. Whether that’s good or bad depends on your perspective, and don’t expect anything extreme. However, the photography is less in the “glamour” realm than usual.
On the negative side, the models’ comments are a distraction. They all try to talk dirty and be racy, but it sounds uniformly fake. None of them are very good actors, especially when they do lines like “you wanna get wet?” These are mostly porn-movie quality performances, and that ain’t good.
But given the highest quality roster of women seen in a Playboy product since the Women of Starbucks DVD, I can excuse this fault. Former Mormon Lovelace is very sexy and natural. She has a lovely face and offers a silly scenario on a trampoline.
In Playboy terms, Jansen is a little flabbier than usual, but she’s still in great shape for real world circumstances. She also has a fantastic chest and is very hot overall. Especially compared to the occasional phoniness of the others, she exhibits sexy and convincing expressions. She’s top-notch.
Shea seems a little stiff, as she’s less comfortable and more staged than the others. Nonetheless she has very nice body and an interesting face, though her braces kind of freak me out. Renee is gorgeous and possibly the best looking of the bunch. She’s not the most natural in front of the camera, and she wears too much makeup, but there’s a a lot of inherent talent to her.
Probably my least favorite model, Knudsen comes across kind of obnoxious. She’s good-looking but somewhat annoying because she tries a little too hard to be a naughty girl. She can be cartoony in looks and behavior and also reminds me too much of Paris Hilton. That’s not a good thing.
Then we go to the naturally sexy Singleton. An unusual mix of Asian and European heritage makes her distinctive and hot. A very sultry woman, she displays a great body and a hot attitude.
In the same vein, Hartling has an absolutely killer body. Her face is not quite as good, but she’s still exceedingly sexy. We get some hot public scenes for her at the beach and roller-blading, and she also offers a great shower piece. She’s a terrific model.
Another good segment comes from Kershner, a nice, natural babe. She has a cute face and tight body. You have to love a nude car waxing sequence too.
Taylor isn’t really my type, but I won’t complain. She presents a solid figure and pretty face but doesn’t remain memorable to me. Puida boasts another amazing body. Her face is a little awkward, but that body more than compensates. She also seems less staged feel than most, largely because she goofs around and doesn’t try to be such a vixen. She gives us very sexy expressions to finish off the DVD on a high note.
Playboy’s Sexiest Amateur Home Videos could have been a bust, but the folks behind it selected well. It includes a strong roster of models who make sure the material lives up to its title.